Thread

" Even a single thread can screw up your day stitching, even more with people."

By adahredha

Family the Spiritual Security

"This is the part of what a family is about, not just love, but letting others know there's someone who is watching out for them. It's what I missed so much when my mother died - what I call your 'spiritual security' - knowing that your family will be there watching out for you. Nothing else will give you that. Not money. Not fame."

Page 92, Tuesday With Morrie 1997, Mitch Albom.

Embrace Aging

Weren't you ever afraid to grow old, I asked?

"Mitch, I embrace aging."

Embrace it?

"It's very simple. As you grow, you learn more. If you stayed at twenty-two, you'd always be as ignorant as you were at twenty-two. Aging is not just decay, you know. It's growth. It's more than the negative that you're going to die, it's also the positive that you understand you're going to die, and that you live a better life because of it."

Page118, Tuesday With Morrie 1997, Mitch Albom.

Detach

"What I'm doing now," he continued, his eyes still closed, "is detaching myself from the experience."

Detaching yourself?

"Yes. Detaching myself. And this is important - not just for someone like me, who is dying, but for someone like you, who is perfectly healthy. Learn to detach."

He opened his eyes. He exhaled. " You know what the Buddhists say? Don't cling to things, because everything is impermanent."

But wait, I said. Aren't you always talking about experiencing life? All the good emotions, all the bad ones?

"Yes."

Well how can you do that if you're detached?

"Ah. You're thinking, Mitch. But detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you. In the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. That's how you are able go leave it."

Page 103, Tuesday With Morrie 1997, Mitch Albom

Purpose and Meaning

....I thought of something else Morrie had told me: "So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

I knew he was right.

(Page 43, Tuesday With Morrie 1997, Mitch Albom)

Love wins

"Have I told you about the tension of opposites?" he says.

The tension of opposites?

"Life is a series of pulls backa nd forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never tak eanything for granted."

"A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle."

Sounds like a wrestling match, I say.

"A wrestlimg match." He laughs. "Yes, you could describe life that way."

So which side wins, I ask?

"Which side wins?"

He smiles at me, the crinkled eyes, the crooked teeth.

"Love wins. Love always wins."

(Page 40, Tuesday With Morrie 1997, Mitch Albom)

The D day

At the moment when I thought I was at the peek of my happiness, I fall.

Fall to the deepest and darkest hole of my life. The day I was screaming and laughing out loud gone. The next day started with broken heart. Clueless I was.

As a human being, being at the bottom is the least likeable condition. And for me, I was reaching out my hand and screaming from the bottom of my heart, for help, for one to grab and pull me up.

At the end of the day, I gave up all. Cried not like a baby buy more like a helpless soldier, stuck in the middle of a war. Hurt. Bleeding. Panic. And all.

The next morning waking up like a dry person. Doing routines and stitching. Each and every stroke was like stitching my own wounded heart. Pain. My heart sunk.

Keep on in climbing the mountain of life with each step took me down again. I was devastated. Staying at the same spot again waiting for a hand to grab me out. Praying to HIM was essential. With every word came out like an arrow shotted to the sky. Hoping.
When I saw a person, look like would pull me out, the person who is so close to my heart, I was delighted. Threw both hands up with hope. Waiting to be saved. To my mistake, I was wrong. Again, I bleed.

Wrapping my both arms to myself, crying till my next day comes. I was wrong. Now I know, no one else should I rely on but HIM. The Most Merciful and the Most Gracious.

May He grants me the happiness again... Aameen.

Dear Future Husband

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

(In the name of God, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful)

.................................................................

While I was cross stitching, my mind wandered across the reality of my life to the future life of mine that I know not. I did have my plan(s). Still, I bear in my heart that He is the only one that knows the best for me.

After posting in Instagram about my little project for Thaqif, a friend's child, my heart grew wary. The cloud turned grey. The sweet strawberry turned sour.

I seek enlightenment from the Book of Love by HIM. And there I found a verse about marriage. I ended my reading at the last verse of the topic. Deep thought surrounded me.

Again this afternoon, the same thought conquered me. And I decided to write a letter for my dear future husband that I never know who, yet.

"Dear Mr. Future Husband, 

When you read this, please bear in mind that I am not desperate to find you nor wanting you instantly. I am just writing this letter for you to know some part of me before you choose me to be your future wife.

Love, Let me tell you what I need from you. And I hope to know what you need from me too. Then, we can tolerate one another to be pronounced as husband and wife. 

Love, It is not gold that I seek. I need affection, attention, care and love more. I might be carried away with these and those, that is the moment when I need you the most to hug me and bring me back to my consciousness. I am not a good cook but I always love to try something new as long as it does no harm to me. Teach me, be with me, encourage me to cook and I will learn to be the best cook for you. I don't have the modelling figure to feed your charming eyes but I do believe that I am beautiful in my own ways. If you think that is not enough, help me to be and stay beautiful for you. Sometimes I can be like a child, seeking your attention and affection, crying over some small matters and explode like a volcano over unimportant things. When I did that, please bear with me, understand me, hold me tight with love and care, just that to calm me down. Sometimes I can be like a manager and the best planner in the world, giving suggestions after suggestions to you which you might feel offended. Please bear in mind, Love, I do that for the best of us. If you still don't like that, tell me, let me know. 

Love, When life hits you hard, remember that I am here. Tell me. Talk to me. Make me feel like I am your bestest friend to listen your wary. I am not good at savings, but I can help in managing out economy together. Please don't apart me from your life. No. Not even a bit. Tell me. Talk to me. I am here. Make me feel like I am your private consultant, the one and only. I am not a doctor but every time you feel unwell, I am the one worries so much about you. Tell me. Talk to me. Make me feel like I am your private nurse. 

Love,I can never be like Fatimah Az Zahra but I am learning and preparing myself to learn and understand about Creator, creations. Still, I know I can never be prepared. I need you to be my guidance. Assist me to be a better muslim so that I can nourish our children to be a better muslim. 

Love, I might forget about little things and important ones, please be patient with me. Sometimes when I am not in focus, I always forget. Remind me always. I can be clumsy too. Still, dont hate me, Love, because sometimes being clumsy is cute. 

Love, I have my own goals. My goals are achievable with or without you. Still, if the destiny decides you would be here by my side before I achieve my goals, you would be one of my goals and I would be delightful to have you as my courage. 

Love, Whoever you are, I want you to know that I have love you since today, the day I write this. I will keep a space for you in my heart that only you can fit in perfectly."

I have more to write but I decide to keep them till I find him.